More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)

[2dognight]

Hi Jack

glad you sorted that out all makes sense now

there is an old saying  'more haste less speed'

Carol

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

My puzzle was jinxed.  I had a look at it a moment ago and the picture of the low battery sign did not come out.  It shows up perfectly on Windows.  Go figure!


Three sons left home, went out on their own, and prospered. Years later, they get back together to discuss the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother for her 90th Birthday.

The first said, "I built a big house for our mother."

The second said," I sent her a Mercedes with a driver."

The third smiled and said, "I've got you, both beat. You know how Mom enjoys the Bible, and you know she can't see very well. I sent her a brown parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took 20 monks in monastery 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000.00 a year for 10 years, but it was worth it. Mom just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it"

Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks:

"Milton," she wrote the first son, "The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."

"Marvin," she wrote to another, " I am too old to travel. I stay home all the time, so I never use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!"

"Dearest Melvin," she wrote to her third son, "You were the only son to have the good sense to know what your mother likes. That chicken was delicious."

[Hobbit]

and Fahrenheit 451, a dystopian novel set in a world where books have been banned, are among his best-known works.

Hi Jack

I haven't sneaked a peek at your spoiler & am hoping I've solved your jinxy puzzle correctly

Apart from your minor issue with the low battery sign it was a great post   A smashing picture of Bonnie   She's growing like the clappers!  Your home Covid Test made my colleague & I really laugh.  Think it's a great idea   Certainly beats the home test I have to do twice a week!

      

What do you call a magician who has no magic...?
Ian!

Did you know that soul singer Bill Withers had a brother called Bear...
he recorded telephone hold music!

I'm starting my new hobby as a bell ringer this evening...
hope they'll show me the ropes!

off to lunch   be back with a puzzle this afternoon

[Hobbit]

I'm back Jack

My puzzle is a character from a book published in the 20th century.
#3 # (4+3) #(4+2+3)

THE
First name of lady in last picture.
A nice easy bonus!  Can you name the author please.

             

In Germany they are preparing for a further lockdown by stocking up with sausage & cheese...
That’s the Wurst Käse scenario!

Leave you with a daft joke

[Hobbit]

I haven't sneaked a peek at your spoiler & am hoping I've solved your jinxy puzzle correctly

I have now


So pleased I got it right

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

I think I have the answer to your puzzle even though it was demned elusive.

I did a draft of a post yesterday but when I came to finish it off this morning, it had disappeared.  I must have forgot to save it.  I think I am losing the plot, Pen.  So I’ll give you a quick puzzle to go on with and do a new post including spoiler alerts later.

My puzzle is a quote from a 1979 British comedy film.

3(#2’1)  #3  3  #7,  3(#2’1) 1  4  7(#6  #1  #3)

’s  the , ’s a very  

Hint: It's not the name of the musician you need but his very famous composition.

[Hobbit]

I think I have the answer to your puzzle even though it was demned elusive.

I did a draft of a post yesterday but when I came to finish it off this morning, it had disappeared.  I must have forgot to save it.  I think I am losing the plot, Pen.  So I’ll give you a quick puzzle to go on with and do a new post including spoiler alerts later.

That's brilliant Jack - spot on

I thought it was only me that did silly damned things like that   If you manage to find the plot let me know as I mislaid it some time ago

I woke up needing to spend a penny just before 4am & am now struggling to keep my eyes open   It took me yonks to drop back off again but I was in a deep sleep when the alarm went off

I'll tackle your puzzle in the morning when, hopefully, I'll be a bit more alert & with it!

[TRex]

Here is more than a bit of irony — according to this story, https://leave.eu/ has moved its website registration from the UK to Ireland in order to retain their (dot)EU registration.

[Ozzyjack]

I'm back, Pen,

Blue asked Sheila what she'd like for her birthday.

"I'd love to be six again," she replied.

On the morning of her birthday, Blue got Sheila up bright and early and off they went to a a well known Surfers Paradise theme park.

What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow!

Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald's they went, where Blue ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.

Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney and what a fabulous adventure!

Finally, she wobbled home with Blue and collapsed into bed.

He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?" One eye opened.

She replied, "You idiot, I meant my dress size."

Moral of the story : Even on the rare occasion a man  pays full attention to what a woman says, he will still get it wrong.


Blue and Sheila were reminiscing about the times they used to visit Amsterdam and eat Eggs Benedict every day for breakfast. She recalled “Those were my Holland days.”

Sheila is normally a fantastic cook, but the sandwiches she made for Blues lunch yesterday were utterly disgusting. When he got home he asked her what was inside and she said “Crab paste”. He asked where she got it from and she replied “The chemist!”


As Pen parked her car in the hospital car park yesterday, this official looking bloke in a viz vest runs up, knocks on her window and exclaims “Oi! That space is reserved for badge holder patients only.”  Pen rolled down her window and explained “That’s OK then. I’ve got a bad shoulder.”

[mkenuk]

Actually he was 'a very n------ b--', but who is arguing?

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Mike,

I think your eyesight is failing, have another look 

[whisky]

Hi

I am not a bird watcher.
I understand that some other forumites are.
This item crossed my screen.
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/mybirdbuddy/bird-buddy-a-smart-bird-feeder
Thought some may be interested.

I have no skin in this game, just sharing info.
Michael

[mkenuk]

Hi Mike,

I think your eyesight is failing, have another look 

And there, magically, the missing word was revealed to all!

 

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

A good night's sleep & feeling bright eyed & bushy tailed this morning!  Don't know how long it'll last

A great puzzle & an hilarious film to boot  

The Blue stories were very funny - especially the dress size one

I'm following on a theme.  Don't think I have the quote spot on but I think you'll get the gist!

#4 #4 #1 #4 #5? #5 #5. #3 #2 #4

? .
Surnames of gents in pictures 2 & 10.

A drunk stumbles out of a bar & sees two priests on the other side of the road.
He staggers across the road & stops in front of them.
He turns to the first priest & says proudly "I'm Jesus Christ"
The priest shakes his head & says "No son, you're not"
He turns to the second priest & repeats "I'm Jesus Christ"
The second priest also shakes his head & says "no you're not son!"
The drunk says "Follow me & I'll prove it to you"
The priests are curious & follow the man as he staggers back into the bar...
As soon as he gets through the door the barman exclaims
"Jesus Christ you're here again!"

            

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

That was a tough puzzle, Pen.  I think I have it nailed but I could not find an exact match although the drift can be found in several sources.

SPOILER ALERT - Today's Puzzle details

I have not progressed my puzzle this morning so I will put it in a later post.

The internet is a marvelous thing, Pen.  At night with my earphones on I can listen in to radio stations anywhere in the world.  Last night I was listening in to one near you and heard these items.

News just in is that two lorries, one full of Cadbury’s and the other full of Lego have crashed on the M4 this morning near Slough. Local radio stations are reporting that the motorway is chock a block.

We went for a walk yesterday around town. It was quite quiet. On the way home, we walked past the local cemetery. It was interesting to read all the gravestone inscriptions through the railings. My wife said “Hey look. There’s a chap here who was 137.” I asked her “What was his name?” She replied “Miles from London.”

Algernon has a wooden motorcycle. Wooden frame, wooden seat, wooden wheels and wooden engine. Does he ride it?   No. It wooden start.

With relaxation of the lockdown rules next week, the Seven Dwarfs have been told that from Monday, they can meet in groups of six. One of them isn't Happy.