More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

It’s Saturday afternoon and I’ve decided to stop doing jobs and have the rest of the day relaxing.  I tried to keep up with Les on the 7-by-many and I am so out of practice that I had to give up.  So, I thought I might find something funny that I haven’t seen before.

     

     

Oh well !!  I’m out of practice at that too.

Your telco jokes were spot on.  I think I was too tired to get angry.  They use COVID-19 as an excuse for their tardiness.

Must go.  It’s wine O’clock.

[Linda]

Kendal is lovely & the people are very friendly.

Kendal is quite lovely.  I used to go to the tech college there when I was a very young teenager.  Had lodgings on Burneside Road and have spent many a happy Friday evening at the Brewery where they used to have 'Rock Night'!!  Happy days! 

It looks like today might be a scorcher - yesterday was warm but cloudy but we have a brilliant blue sky today - will make the most of it.  Chair in garden, cool drink and good book .. bliss!! 

[cmh]

Currently basking in sunshine wearing cool dress but sadly going into work at noon and will have to don black trousers and a black t shirt. GRRR!!

[Hobbit]

I was just going to tell Linda to enjoy her lovely lazy day & your message popped up Christine. I sympathise as I have to wear navy polyester blouse & black trousers to work. Perfect if you want to sweat! Just think about Monday & 3 days off🙂

[Hobbit]

It’s Saturday afternoon and I’ve decided to stop doing jobs and have the rest of the day relaxing.  I tried to keep up with Les on the 7-by-many and I am so out of practice that I had to give up.  So, I thought I might find something funny that I haven’t seen before.

Oh well !!  I’m out of practice at that too.

Hi Jack. Sorry but I'd have to disagree with you.  They were all funny & we hadn't seen any of them before

It's another hot & humid day here.  Worse since the sun went in about half an hour ago & there's not a puff of air
Remind me of this when I'm complaining about the cold in the winter!

        

Leave you with a small random assortment.  I'm going to melt into a puddle!



ps we haven't had any pups for a few days...

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

I liked your cartoons better.

Looks like Kimmy is sleepier than me

The boys are going to have to learn martial arts.

   

“I wouldn’t be rough like that”

   


And I’ll leave you with Fitzy’s Joke of the week.

A young man, thrown into a prolonged period of self-isolation with his elderly grandmother, is looking feverishly about the house and finally can stand it no longer. He shouts from his room, ''Granny, have you seen my pills? I put them in your old headache-tablet bottle and marked them LSD.''

“Bugger your pills,” Granny responds from down the hall, “have you seen all the dragons playing trombones in the kitchen?”

[les303]

Hi Les
 I'm not sure you have salad cream in your neck of woods.  Linda & I love it - has to be Heinz   When I'm watching the telly later I will be enjoying a glass or 2 of what Jack calls my pink muck
[/quote]

Yes Pen, we do have many varieties of " salad creams " which we refer to as mayonnaise.
I think that we even have a few places in Australia who still manufacture Heinz products here.
Heinz is a brand that i grew up with so it has been around forever & i always just assumed that it was an Australian owned company although i vaguely remember reading somewhere that they were bought out by an American company many years ago.
So i was a bit surprised to hear that Heinz is so popular in the U.k. but you are probably going to tell me that i have this entirely wrong & Heinz is an English owned company.
Not that it really matters who controls the company these days, i just enjoy their products, many items in my pantry bear the Heinz label. ( including mayo )

Jack might have to stock up on some  " pink muck " for himself, to get him through cleaning up all of the " yellow & brown muck " until the puppies are fully toilet trained.

[Hobbit]

Yes Pen, we do have many varieties of " salad creams " which we refer to as mayonnaise.
I think that we even have a few places in Australia who still manufacture Heinz products here.
Heinz is a brand that i grew up with so it has been around forever & i always just assumed that it was an Australian owned company although i vaguely remember reading somewhere that they were bought out by an American company many years ago.

Jack might have to stock up on some  " pink muck " for himself, to get him through cleaning up all of the " yellow & brown muck " until the puppies are fully toilet trained.

Hi Les

I did think that Heinz was an American company so I checked with Ms Google & that is right. My best friend's Dad & brother-in-law both spent most of their working life at Heinz in Hayes which is in London.  I've been scoffing their baked beans since I was knee high to a grasshopper   Salad cream & mayo are very different here!  I like both but prefer salad cream as it's tangier.  Too much mayo can be a bit sickly.  For lunch today I have boiled egg bashed up with salad cream & ham sarnies Delish to quote Linda!

I think that if Jack is in need of a fortifying tipple he's far more likely to reach for a glass of sauv blanc or a large malt rather than resorting to my "pink muck"

Time to put the kettle on.  Do you think it'll suit me?
Pen

[Linda]

I like both but prefer salad cream as it's tangier.

Presactly! 

I have had an egg, salad cream and tomato baguette for my lunch - extra delish. 

More salad cream needed for this evening as I'm having chicken salad so obviously the bottle will be out again!  It's 30% less fat salad cream - virtuous!! 

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

I really enjoyed your post   The pictures are brilliant - the ladies really are top dogs   The little snippet is brilliant!

         

I can't match Fitzy's joke but leave you with these!
An elephant drinking from a stream spots a tortoise lounging on the shore. He grabs it with his trunk and flings it into the jungle. A passing zebra asks, "Why did you do that?" ...... "Forty years ago that very tortoise nipped my tail just for fun," the elephant said. "Wow, forty years ago! How did you remember that?" "Well I have turtle recall," replied the elephant.

A bilingual road sign in Wales caught bikers off guard. The English part read Cyclists Dismount. The Welsh: Llid Y Bledren Dymchwelyd, or "Bladder disease has returned." One theory for the mistake—instead of typing cyclist into an online translation programme, someone typed cystitis instead!

[Hobbit]

I have had an egg, salad cream and tomato baguette for my lunch - extra delish. 
More salad cream needed for this evening as I'm having chicken salad so obviously the bottle will be out again!  It's 30% less fat salad cream - virtuous!! 

Mmmm sounds very yummy Linda   You are being very good with your healthy eating   I have a scotch egg salad later.  With coleslaw & lots of salad cream.  Full fat for me

[auntiemo]

Hi Linda and Penny....you two can be very proud of yourselves. All this talk of your lunchtime sandwiches has led me to the "sauces & dressings" aisle of my local Woolies supermarket....to find the salad cream. I had totally forgotten about salad cream. I'm  pretty sure we would have had to seek it out in a specialty shop years ago and I bought mayonnaise instead. Or maybe I rebelled when I left my parent's home ( Scottish upbringing ) and switched to mayo . But between you two and James May on YouTube with Food from the 70's, I had to have salad cream....and it was soooo good on my cheese and tomato sandwich!!! Married to an Australian for 45 years and he'd never had it before.
Thanks ladies...might have egg and salad cream today.

So, Les...Try the Salad Cream!

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

In Facebook today, I think we got a look at the other people lined up for the puppies.

The caption was “5 weeks old today   only one week until we start making decisions on where these babies will spend their lives.   ”






Today’s story is set, I hope, a long time in the future.  It was sent to me in an email with very graphic pictures but I deleted them from this post in case they got Les too excited.

Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton both die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven.  Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in.

The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven. Dolly takes off her top and says, 'Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.'

The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question. The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, drinks it down. Then, pees into a toilet and pulls the lever.

The Angel says, 'OK, your Majesty, you may go in.'

Dolly is outraged and asks, 'What was that all about?  I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She pees into a toilet and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?'

'Sorry, Dolly,' says the Angel, ‘but even in Heaven, a Royal Flush beats a Pair - no matter how big they are’.


I must go and mow the lawn.  The grass grows faster here in a week than it did in a month down in the Highlands.

[les303]

 " Time to put the kettle on.  Do you think it'll suit me?
Pen '"

Sorry ladies but i had never actually heard of salad cream so just assumed that it was the same as mayo. ( i should use google more often ... by the way when it become Ms google ... do you get the same results from Mr google ?)
I do enjoy mayo sometimes particularly with a coleslaw type salad but generally prefer the much lighter salad dressings of which we have a huge variety.
And when it comes to sammies, my preference is for relish usually corn or tomato but i will definitely be giving salad cream a go if my local Woolies even stocks it.
Have to go and get a strong drink now as Jack's old " Dolly " joke has indeed got me all excited.

P.S... Pen i am sure that you would look quite lovely weather it be the kettle or anything else that you are putting on.

[2dognight]

Hi Les

My local tiny Woolies sell it, so you should alright

Carol