More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Mike,

Bonus awarded.

I agree with your horror of “eatarium” in another thread.  Luckily, a quick google appears to show it is currently confined to one restaurant chain in Thailand.

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

Another quickie again, sorry.  I forgot until after gym yesterday morning that I am on horse picking duty again and that distracted me from looking up Blue for one of his stories.


   




The answer to the challenge is something that happened in England to a well-known person in the 13^th Century.  
4 4 4 3 5 6 2 3 4

   his in the

The bonus point is for the naming the year it happened.


If the road is open, we will be on our way to Canberra by 8 O’clock.

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

No 'sorry' please.  My post is a quickie too as I'm knacked from my drive earlier  I was driving into a very low sun all the way there & it gave me a bit of a headache.  I was pleased & relieved to get home

Loved your cartoons - especially the third one
Zoe solved your puzzle  Did the monarch in question lose his valuables in the washing machine in 1216

   

Going to flop in my armchair & enjoy a film & a small glass (or 2 )of sauvignon blanc

Hope you have an enjoyable & safe trip to Canberra & all your horses romp home

Pen

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

I called in on Blue on my way to Canberra and he told me in his younger days he published poetry in a book "Verse and Worse - A Private Collection by Arnold Silcock".  He said he was published under the by-line Anon. I suspect he was pulling my leg but Andrew has a copy of the book, so, here is a sample.

What a wonderful bird the frog are
When he stand he sit almost;
When he hop he fly almost.
He ain't got no sense hardly;
He ain't got no tail hardly either.
When he sit, he sit on what he ain't got almost.


There was a young lady from Tottenham
Who'd no manners, or else she'd forgottenham
While at tea at the vicars
She took off her knickers
Because, she explained, she felt 'ottenham


We 'ad a bleedin' sparrer wot
Lived up a bleedin' spaht
One day the bleedin' rain came dahn
An' washed the bleeder aht.

An' as 'e layed 'arf drahnded
Dahn in the bleedin' street
'E begged that bleedin' rainstorm
To bave 'is bleedin' feet.

But then the bleedin' sun came aht
Dried up the bleedin' rain
So that bleedin' little sparrer
'E climbs up 'is spaht again.

But, Oh! - the cruel sparrer 'awk
'E spies 'im in 'is snuggery
'E sharpens up 'is bleedin' claws
An' rips 'im aht by thuggery.

Jist then a bleedin' sportin' type
Wot 'ad a bleedin' gun
'E spots that bleedin' sparrer 'awk
An' blasts 'is bleedin' fun.

The moral of the story
Is plain to everyone...
That them wot's up the bleedin' spaht
Don't get no bleedin' fun.

Must hit the hay again.

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

Very glad you called on Blue on your way to Canberra & even gladder that Andrew had that book   Really loved the poems Brilliant!
Don't think I can match you but I found some bits & pieces on Will & Guy's website that tickled me.

The first 2 are newspaper clippings & the last 2 are notices from a Tokyo hotel.  No idea if they're genuine but they made me chuckle!

SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping and fishing trips, cosy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours. Call (404) 875-6420 and ask for Daisy.

Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society about an 8-week old black Labrador retriever.

 
'A caller complained to Trading Standards. After dialling an 0891 number from an advertisement entitled, 'Hear Me Moan', the caller was played a tape of a woman nagging her husband for failing to do jobs around the house. Consumer Watchdogs in Dorset refused to look into the complaint, saying, 'He got what he deserved.'

Holiday at a Tokyo Hotel

Funny Hotel Notices In The Lobby:
1.English well speaking.
2.We take your bags and send them in all direction.
3.In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.
4.The elevator is being fixed for the next day.
During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
5.In the lift:
Do not enter the elevator backwards, and only when lit up.
6.To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor.
7.Customers are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 am daily.

Funny Notices In the Bedroom:
1.Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please.  If you are not person to do such thing please not to read notice.
2.Please to bathe inside the tub.
3.Please leave your values at the front desk.
4.You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
5.Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

    

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

I liked all your humour but you would have guessed the German kinder was my favourite.

We are visiting a friend in hospital this afternoon and then heading home.


Little Willie from his mirror
    Sucked the mercury all off,
  Thinking, in his childish error,
    It would cure his whooping-cough.
  At the funeral, Willie’s mother
    Smartly said to Mrs. Brown,
  “T was a chilly day for William
    When the mercury went down.”

The setting for today’s challenge is a confrontation in London’s East End in the 1930’s between the British Union of Fascists protected by the Metropolitan Police and an anti-fascist crowd consisting mainly of Jews and Irish Catholic Dockers.  The answer is a headline you could expect in a modern-day newspaper reporting on it.
9(4 3 ‘s) 11(5 6) 10(3 3 4) 2 3 2 3 6 2 5 5

The bonus point is for naming the date

’s     by in the of  

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

I was trying to remember if this was the same friend you visited in hospital a while back.  My memory just aint what it used to be  Anyway I hope it was a good visit & your friend is on the mend. Hopefully by now you're tucked up in bed & snoring

I very much enjoyed your poem.  Your challenge has decimated my little grey cell
So far I've got Mosley's Blackshirts ?? by mob in the battle of Cable Street.  I'm struggling with the statue in picture 5.  I'm going to leave it for now!

My puzzle by comparison is very easy!
It's an old comedy programme.  7, 3, 3

&

Here's a small random(ish) selection for your amusement!  I'm going to lay in a darkened room for 15 minutes before I contemplate that cooking malarkey
   

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

We arrived home safely although the smoke was even worse than on the way down.

At my age, you get lots of old friends who go to hospital.

The friend you were thinking about is one of my punting group from Sydney.  The friend I visited yesterday worked with me for about 15 years in Canberra and we've kept in touch.  

If you make the statue bigger it will probably give you the answer



If it doesn't try this alternative (A's suggestion} for the word your searching for. 2 4 4



It took me a while to get your challenge.  I got fixated on "ski" for the 3 letter word and I missed the ampersand.  I think A would have got it immediately. An erudite person with a miserable old git for a father.

It's past time for Back to Bed, Fred

[Hobbit]

Thanks Jack.  Humiliated   I am a fan of Hugh Grant though I know a lot of people don't like him.  I saw a documentary on BBC2 just after Christmas & it was interesting & he came across as a decent bloke.  He was excellent in Paddington2.  One of my most favouritist films ever

Exactly the same could be said of Zoe!  Except she's stuck with a female Victor Meldrew for a mother   Did you get One Foot in the Grave?  If you didn't then you wont have a clue what I'm waffling about!  I actually don't think you're a miserable old git at all!  Quite the reverse.  Am I allowed to say a funny (ha ha not peculiar!) old git with a very wicked sense of humour

My poor brain cell is partially recovered from earlier so I'm going to give it a small workout.

[mkenuk]

I am a fan of Hugh Grant though I know a lot of people don't like him.

Add my name to the list of members of the Hugh Grant fan club.
One of the best British actors for years. 'Bridget Jones' Diary' is one of the greatest British comedies of all time;
as Jeremy Thorpe in 'A Very British......' he proved he could do serious roles as well as comedy.

[Hobbit]

Morning Jack

Found this & thought it might tickle you

Kaola

Back later...
Pen

[Ozzyjack]

Hi Pen,

Loved that video about the drop bear.

I am low on inspiration tonight, so it is lucky Blue dropped in this arvo to share a couple of his poems.

There was an old man of Darjeeling
Who boarded a bus bound for Ealing
It said on the door
‘Don't spit on the floor'
So he stood up and spat on the ceiling.

A novice was driving a car,
When,down Porlock, his son said, ‘Papa,
If you drive at this rate
We are bound to be late -
Drive faster!’  - He did, and they are!

He grabbed me around my slender neck,
I could not shout or scream
He carried me into his room
Where we could not seen
He tore away my flimsy wrap
and Gazed upon my form
I was so cold and still and damp
While he was wet and warm
His feverish mouth, he pressed to mine-
I let him have his way
He drained me of my very self
I could not say him nay
HE made me what i am...alas
Thats why you find me here....
A broken vessel, broken glass
That once held a bottle of beer.

 

[Hobbit]

It'smee 2 Again!

Thought you'd enjoy the drop bear.  I thought it was hilarious   Please tell Blue I liked his poems
Having a very busy day at work!  Was going to try & think up a tricky puzzle to get my own back for your blackshirt challenge  
Sadly my poor old brain is struggling to multitask I think you'll find it a bit easy peasy!

This is an event that happened in 1936.  It's 3 words 4, 6, 9.  Please take away the first letter of picture 3.



      

I'll leave you with a limerick
There was a young fellow named Perkins
Who was terribly fond of small gherkins
One day after tea
He ate ninety three
And pickled his internal workings

[Ozzyjack]

Was going to try & think up a tricky puzzle to get my own back for your blackshirt challenge  

Hi Pen,

Well you had a minor win in that it took me ages to find out who the guy in the second picture was although I knew what his first name had to because I had worked out the rest of the clues. It was a good puzzle and very topical as the current shenanigans at the Palace could be seen as modern-day microcosm of the answer to your puzzle.


   

I don't know if you've heard that workers are being systematically ripped off in Australia. Examples are seemingly without end: from pizzas to posh nosh, from convenience stores and corner cafes to supermarkets, on farms and in franchises across Australia. Investigations continue to show that workers' are being paid less than they are legally entitled to.  The government has finally ordered an official investigation.

The Department charged with the investigation suspected Blue was not paying proper wages to his workers and sent an agent out to interview him.

“I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,” demanded the agent.

“Well,” replied Blue, “There’s my farm hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $600 a week plus free room and board. The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $500 a week plus free room and board. Then there’s the half-wit who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90 percent of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of Single Malt every Saturday night.”

“That’s the guy I want to talk to, the half-wit,” says the agent.

“That would be me,” replied Blue.


This is the background to today’s puzzle.

Life as an English farmworker in the 1830s was dismal. Rent and a basic diet of tea, bread and potatoes would cost a typical family 13 shillings a week. But exploitative landowners, given land by the Enclosures, paid their workers as little as 9, 8, even 7 shillings. Six such men in 1832 founded the Friendly Society of Agricultural Labourers, demanding 10 shillings a week. A local landowner reported them, and under an obscure 1797 law they were arrested and transported to Australia.  In England they became popular heroes and 800,000 signatures were collected for their release. Their supporters organised a political march, one of the first successful marches in the United Kingdom, and all were eventually pardoned in March 1836 and all were released by 1837. Four returned to England. They are still celebrated in trades union history.

The answer to the puzzle is to work out what the question is.    The bonus point is for answering the question correctly. 6 3 3 5 3 3 2020 9(3,6) 7 8?

What are the   the 2020    ?

Hints:  Only use the first syllable of the Russian Authors surname and discard the first syllable of the fruit.  Most people think it is a vegetable.

[Hobbit]

Hi Jack

I think it's fair to say you have had a major win with your challenge today  I've got the subject matter but can't suss out the actual question yet.  I will return to it this afternoon when I have the pleasure of the fracture clinic!  Perhaps some lunch might help the brain cell a bit

I did choose my last puzzle with all the royal shenanigans in mind   I'm actually feeling quite nostalgic for Brexit

   

Like Arnie I'll be back...