Author Topic: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)  (Read 814677 times)

Linda

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #405 on: March 01, 2018, 10:33:37 PM »
Quote
When shall we three meet again
In thunder, lightning, or in rain?

We may just be keeping our own counsel for a while, Les.  Beware!  >:D

Ozzyjack

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #406 on: March 02, 2018, 01:48:27 AM »
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When shall we three meet again
In thunder, lightning, or in rain?

We may just be keeping our own counsel for a while, Les.  Beware!  >:D

Linda, I read the following analysis of the three witches;

The Three Witches -  Three “black and midnight hags” who plot mischief against Macbeth using charms, spells, and prophecies. Their predictions prompt him to murder Duncan, to order the deaths of Banquo and his son, and to blindly believe in his own immortality. The play leaves the witches’ true identity unclear—aside from the fact that they are servants of Hecate, we know little about their place in the cosmos. In some ways they resemble the mythological Fates, who impersonally weave the threads of human destiny. They clearly take a perverse delight in using their knowledge of the future to toy with and destroy human beings..

This doesn’t line up with my view of the forumite Hags except in cleverness and wit.  I understand you were broad minded and inclusive enough to invite Smaug, a male, to be an honorary Hag.  However, if you do decide to visit the dark side, please be kind to MacLes.
« Last Edit: March 02, 2018, 05:15:51 AM by Ozzyjack »
Regards, Jack

Linda

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #407 on: March 02, 2018, 03:21:35 AM »
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Fair is foul, and foul is fair:

MacLes will just have to take his chances! Cackle, cackle!  >:D

birdy

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #408 on: March 02, 2018, 12:41:27 PM »
(Just quietly lying in wait, lying in wait...)

Les303

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #409 on: March 02, 2018, 05:21:23 PM »

We may just be keeping our own counsel for a while, Les.  Beware!  >:D
[/quote]

That reminds me of a little story that ozziejack once told me about ozziejune ;

Not  too many people would know this but June's first job was actually as a counselor at their local primary school.
Her first morning was rather quite so she decided to use some initiative & patrol the schoolyard during the liunch break so that she might get to know some of the children.
As she approached the sporting field she observed a group of boys all enjoying themselves as they kicked around a soccer ball but to her dismay she also noticed one little boy standing all by himself way down the other end of the field.
She went up to the boy, introduced herself & asked was he ok?
I'm fine thankyou Miss.
Not convinced, she continued on her patrol & returned to the sports field 10 minutes later.
Her heart sank as she saw this poor little boy still standing alone in exactly the same spot while all the other boys were having fun way down the other end of the field.
Hello again, it's me June & what is your name, are you sure everything is ok?
My name is John & yes thankyou, everything is just fine.
As she continued on her patrol all she could think of was the pained & puzzled expression on that little boys face , i just have to get him to open up to me.
5 minutes later & June returns to the sportsfield & again approaches John.
John, i know that you must be having problems so i need for you to talk to me & tell me why you have been standing here all by yourself for all this time while everybody else is having so much fun way down the other end of the field.
I'm the goalkeeper.




Rider ---Some of all of the above story is of course total fiction.





Ozzyjack

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #410 on: March 02, 2018, 09:25:39 PM »
Rider ---Some of all of the above story is of course total fiction.

No need for the rider, Les, you are allowed some poetic licence when telling a good story.  I’ve already shared my motto of “never let the facts spoil a good story”.   

In fact, your story was very close to the facts. It was not a matter of initiative that she would patrol the schoolyard, it was the job of all junior schoolteachers to do it. You portrayed her concern for the young boy superbly.

June was very young when she went to university and after four years, degree and diploma of education, she went straight to teaching Secondary school. By the time I met her about 18 months later, she was teaching Leaving Certificate classes in which some of the repeating students weren’t much younger than she was.

The story would have been spoilt if the game had not been Soccer. However, I believe Soccer only got introduced to NSW/ACT  schools some 20 or 30 years later.  NSW was Rugby League obsessed and ACT, Rugby Union.

Now, about those wonderful Hags.  If you play your cards right, you might get an invite to be an honorary hag as Smaug did. But if you upset them “Be afraid, be very afraid
Regards, Jack

Linda

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #411 on: March 03, 2018, 12:11:46 AM »
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By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes.

... be careful what you wish for, MacMen!  >:D

Hobbit

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #412 on: March 03, 2018, 06:40:33 AM »
Les & Jack I'm not giving much for your chances with the hags but I do wish you the best of luck! Sage advice - Be afraid, be very afraid!
Les I love the joke about spot the sheepdog & the story about Ozziejune.  Am feeling a bit under the weather with a rotten cold & head full of cotton wool. Cheered me up for a few minutes. You might have to despatch a hot toddy my way...
Pen
If life gives you lemons, add a large gin & some tonic...

Ozzyjack

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #413 on: March 03, 2018, 08:51:23 AM »
Les & Jack I'm not giving much for your chances with the hags but I do wish you the best of luck!

Pen, I am trying to distance myself from Les on this.  I have learnt my lesson from trying for over 50 years to outsmart a woman who is much smarter than me and coming off second best every time. So I have conceded even before the contest begins and I am furiously waving the white flag. 

But I suspect Les is made of sterner stuff and will not be able to resist the challenge to exercise his rapier-like wit.

My mate "Bed" Owen reminded me of his favorite quote which I pass on to the Hags with the greatest of humility.
Quote
It's probably better to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside the tent pissing in. Lyndon Johnson, as quoted in The New York Times (31 October 1971).
***************************************************************************************************



Quote
Am feeling a bit under the weather with a rotten cold & head full of cotton wool.

Now we have got the serious stuff out of the way, I will try to cheer you up.

First of all, throw out the cotton wool and replace it with Bundaberg OP rum (Les's favourite tipple when he has drunk the Pub dry of XXXX).

Is it true you told the Doctor? “My dear doctor, I’m surprised to hear you say that I am coughing very badly, because I have been practicing all night.”

Les walked into the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, ”Do you have any acetylsalicylic acid?”
“Do you mean aspirin?” says the pharmacist.
“That’s it, I can never remember that word.”

The Doctor tells Ocker he has very bad flu. Ocker says he wants a second opinion. The doctor says, ”OK, you’re ugly too”.

I hope you recover quickly, Pen, we need you to post regularly. You are the only one who can control Les. >:D :D




Regards, Jack

anona

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #414 on: March 03, 2018, 11:07:34 AM »
Pen: my grandfather's friend used to swear by a brisk walk on the top of the mountain while eating two raw (peeled) onions. Strangely, I've not had the stamina to try this, when crawling out to the kettle is about as much as I can manage.

And of course you do need to have a mountain near you (which I have, but even so).

Perhaps the rum remedy does have more appeal ...


Les303

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #415 on: March 03, 2018, 06:27:49 PM »
Les & Jack I'm not giving much for your chances with the hags but I do wish you the best of luck! Sage advice - Be afraid, be very afraid!
Les I love the joke about spot the sheepdog & the story about Ozziejune.  Am feeling a bit under the weather with a rotten cold & head full of cotton wool. Cheered me up for a few minutes. You might have to despatch a hot toddy my way...
Pen

So sorry to hear that you are not feeling well with a rotten cold. ( is there such a thing as a nice cold? )

Jack's suggestion of a couple of rums is actually a pretty good idea.
After about the third or fourth drink, you will forget that you even have a cold & by the time that you recover from the next mornings hangover, the cold will either be totally gone or ten times worse.

Incredibley that was Jack's second good suggestion in a row although i quickly rejected the first where he suggested that i should not " take on " the hags.

As you seem to support that suggestion then i will of course withdraw ;












Les303

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #416 on: March 03, 2018, 07:48:17 PM »

My best recommendation when suffering from a cold is oysters as they provide a very high level of zinc.
Zinc is responsible for white blood cell function, which is associated with fighting viruses and bacteria.
Zinc is also important for the health of mucus membranes, our barrier between our internal and external environment .
Of course there is another benefit that can be derived from eating lots of oysters, but i won't go into that on this family friendly website.

Hobbit

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #417 on: March 04, 2018, 06:48:01 AM »
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Pen: my grandfather's friend used to swear by a brisk walk on the top of the mountain while eating two raw (peeled) onions. Strangely, I've not had the stamina to try this, when crawling out to the kettle is about as much as I can manage.

Thanks (I think!) Anona for your rather dodgy remedy!  I live in Milton Keynes which is pretty much as flat as a pancake!  The nearest thing to a mountain from here is the Chiltern Hills which are splendid but certainly tiddly compared to the wonderful mountains in Wales & Scotland.  Think I'll stick to the rum.  As Les says after a couple I probably wont care less!!
Pen
If life gives you lemons, add a large gin & some tonic...

Hobbit

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #418 on: March 04, 2018, 07:00:43 AM »
Hi Les & Jack
thanks for your good wishes & Jack you hit the nail on the head about the bloody coughing >:(
Think I'll give the rum a whirl though I doubt I can get Bundaberg OP Rum in snowy Bletchley!
Sorry Les will pass on the oysters.  Just the thought of them makes me shiver more than I already am :laugh:
Look forward to any anecdotes or jokes in the name of medicine!
I hate being crook (is that right or should it be crock?)  Not a very patient patient!
Penx

If life gives you lemons, add a large gin & some tonic...

Valerie

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Re: More or Les (was Bloody Plurals)
« Reply #419 on: March 04, 2018, 11:30:40 AM »
Dear Hobbit

Do hope you are up-n-at-em again very soon.  In response to your request for jokes to make you feel better, this one was in our Sydney Morning Herald newspaper today.  It's not exactly about being crook but, having never had kids myself, I'd say it comes pretty close.

Due to a major power blackout in one of those backward states that hasn’t had the foresight to invest in reliable renewable energy systems, only one paramedic is able to respond to a call from a woman, who is suddenly caught short and about to give birth in her own home.
The house is very, very dark, so the paramedic asks the woman’s three-year-old daughter, Katelyn, to hold a flashlight high over her mother so he can see while he helps deliver the baby.
Very diligently, Katelyn does as she is asked. Her mother pushes and pushes, and, after a little while, her baby brother is born.
The paramedic cuts the cord, lifts him by his little feet and, in the classic fashion, smacks him once on his bottom. The little one begins to cry.
The paramedic thanks Katelyn for her help and asks the wide-eyed three-year-old what she thinks about what she has just witnessed. Katelyn quickly responds, “He shouldn’t have crawled in there in the first place. Smack him again.”

Cheers
Val
I'll sleep in my next life